Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
You were plastered and wouldn't stop telling this hot girl about your plan to graffiti a church in easter colored spray-paint saying that Jesus was a Zombie... she kept saying her father was a pastor...
lesson learned: don't narrate out loud about how a girl is giving you head while she's doing it
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
Being able to fart in my own house is like 90% of why I pay rent
Do I get bonus points if I get lockjaw after a cosmic blowjob?
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
Randomize
