If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
They walked in to the store, ripped up the phone book, and left. Can we get on their level?
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
Believe it or not, that's part of the whole 'best friend' thing. It's not just yelling at me for making you leave the club early or taking the couch bc I'm doing sex while you're doing bjs.
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
She just came home holding a fire hydrant. Yes a fire hydrant.
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
Mom looked at me, frowned, and said "it makes me sad to see you drink before noon.." So i told her if she doesn't like it she needs to stop waking me up before noon.
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
I swear to god, my hangover cure is a green tea and a 15 minute twerkout. works every time
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
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