Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
the only reason i invite her is so when the guys start to hit on her i know it's time to take their keys
And then she was like, "don't do anything. No blow jobs, don't let him stick his fingers in weird places because people have germs."
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
I believe I won the Golden Vodka Bottle of sadness last night for crying while being party boyed.
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
I found a half composed text to you this morning and all it said was HELP M. Is that how I ended up at the bottom of the stairwell in only a tee-shirt and one heel?
considering I never received the text I would go with 'yes'.
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
That's nice of you to be concerned, but I'm pretty confident I'll marry someone 30 years older than me, ride out being the trophy wife for 10 or 15 years, then live large!
Randomize
