With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
I have a running excel spreadsheet detailing the number of shots in a night and subsequent ability to masturbate
I'm wearing this super skanky ass dress that's wayyy to slutty for church but I think Jesus will appreciate it because i look so bangin for his bday.
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
For what it's worth, I didn't think that hitting you with a crowbar as hard as I did would break your arm like that. You should drink more milk.
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
Asking me to suck on my nipples isn't going to make me less mad at you.
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
Dude, he came to our house with a beer can in his hand dressed up in a chicken suit screaming, "free eggs!" then threw up and passed out in the front yard.
Randomize
