But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
How do you say "I'm not pregnant in Spanish?"
Do you remember that blonde girl he brought home from the bar on Friday night? She didn't leave until Monday afternoon. We didn't even know she was still in his room...what a sketchy weekend.
There is a guy dressed as Captain America in the theatre. I want to make out with him even though I have no idea what he looks like. Wish me luck, I'm going in.
This was just another one of those days you wished you had a penis-size indicator instead of wasting your time isn't it?
I love you like a cupcake loves an overweight child, very similar to the mannerisms of a whole cake but personal, and minus the commitment issues, plus just the right amount of icing; not to mention the convenience of mobility, and only a smidgen of the guilt😘
Almost told my boss I was an expert aat swallowing when he questioned my ability to take excedrin,xanax, and a vitamin all at once. It was a medicinal gang bang lubricated by arizona tea.
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
Randomize
