Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
There's a guy at this party taking all the unfinised beers and pouring them into a pitcher so he can drink them tomorrow.
8$ liquor pitchers. I'm gonna wear two or three pairs of underwear so when drunk me takes them off there'll still be a pair on.
The vomit I understand but how is there seaweed in my bed?
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
I found your pet lobster in the bathroom this morning. I went to return it to you but it escaped.
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
Girl just walked into the bar with a T-shirt that says "I'm not Irish, kiss me anyways." Target aquired.
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
By the time we got to McDonald's you were sharing a Big Mac with a stripper.
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
Randomize
