i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
If I could have all the money back from the pregnancy test i've bought- I could buy myself a vacation.
Or a large amount of condoms?!?
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
Just saw an old lady vomit in a trash can at the airport. I instinctively called her a pussy. College has ruined us.
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
If I get one more "oh yaaaaa he changed your oil" texts, I'm gonna lose my shit
my roommate was being a bitch so I changed my Netflix password on her. 21st century slap in the face ladies and gentleman
Why does my nose taste spicy?
How do you know what your nose tastes like?
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
Randomize