well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
He told me he had more lines than a plaid shirt
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
SHE SITS THERE LIKE A DICK LIKE AN ACTUAL DICK JUST LIMP AND DUMB AND BLAH
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
When i sexted him a pic of my boobs I was worried he was going to notice the dorito crumbs and know I was just eating topless
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
Dude. She was wearing nothing but Wonder Woman panties and a flag for a cape and sneaking around leaving PBR's by passed out people for the morning. She called herself the 'Merica Fairy.
Why haven't you proposed already?
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
You'll love it there. Trust me. Cheap tequila, pretentious beer, tall white guys who will treat you badly. Its got everything you like.
Note to Self: Never again eat a weed brownie by yourself two hours before a tornado warning in your exact location.
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