Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
You think if I promise to behave for the rest of my life, god will let me fuck her on the regular?
I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
he fucked my hip out of place.
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
When my mom found out he was a high school drop out she was like "seriously? Can we raise the bar a little higher next time kels?" So my moms pretty cool
then looked at this little girl next to me and was like "don't drink when you get older and don't let your best friend be with assholes." she looked at me like i was crazy
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
Randomize
