im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
look out your window.... he's holding his iphone up like a boombox playing you beach boys
He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
Weirdly I'm doing ok, but I've tested positive for chlamydia, I wanted to let you know
Hey dude. I've got a mini fridge in my closet now so we don't have to worry about getting drunk and falling down the stairs on our way to get more beer.
Eating a TV dinner and watching Goosebumps on Netflix, the sad, sad title of my autobiography.
Ran out of deodorant. Febreze on a paper towel? Kicking college's ass.
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
Update on my sex life: my calves are sore from masturbating too much. It's a thing. Look it up.
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
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