playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
im about as happy as oj after his trial
I really liked your hair last night but that style makes it really hard to hold it while you puke
guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
Sorry about last night..I didnt realize how drunk you were and when I closed the door it caused you to slam into the mirror...you'll probably piece together the puzzle when you read this and see your hand.
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
Bren left me with a lovely parting gift. Newfouund alcoholism. I'm on the kitchen floor, hugging a bottle of vodka. It's my only friend now.
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
I was trying to drink every time they said planned parenthood but my body isn't cut out for this.
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
Randomize
