roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
I got spanked with a cardboard tube. Apparently he used to be a percussionist. Who favored marching band tunes. It was weird.
The fact that I found him in his Ninja Turtles t-shirt next to six empty and obviously consumed packs of EasyMac watching reruns of Becker certainly made telling him that I wanted a divorce so much easier than I had planned.
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
id say I'm a pretty good fuck buddy, i didn't even booty call him on his girlfriends birthday
It's a hurricane, not a zombie apocalypse. WHY DID YOU BUY SHOTGUNS?!?!
I can't remember much from that party after we snapchatted my dancing boobs to all of her contacts
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
I was covered in mud from my knees down, I smelt like the inside of a port-a-potty and only had mascara on one eye. . . so you know your usual Sunday brunch.
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
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