who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
The bartender told me the best pick-up line was to look deep into her eyes and tell her your gonna flick her vagina
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
The a/c is broken so they cut a softball size whole in the freezer door. Goodbye deposit.
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
Sorry about peeing on your phone last night
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
Randomize
