Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
Any questions about why there was a scuba tank chilling in the hot tub this morning?
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
All I vaguely remember from last night is getting up on that nice mahogany table and debating about squirrel's rights
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
In hindsight, drunkenly yelling "I'M TICKLISH" might not have been an entirely wise decision
Good news y'all just straight up snorted 2 adderall and I'm not a real being on this plane of existence anymore and I'm ready for finals
I feel I should send an apology letter to my anesthesiologist.
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
Randomize
