I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
Time flies when you're blacked out in a lake
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
I'm not saying I haven't been that drunk. I'm just saying I haven't been that drunk and then have cops buy me shots.
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
I slapped a guy during sex last night because he moaned the wrong name. Then I remembered I gave him a fake name. Sorry bro.
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
you said you were going to the bathroom. we found you an hour later laying in the backyard clutching a bottle of vodka while singing the beatles and crying
Randomize
