it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
Come put a leash on your gf. She just challenged 8 cops to a wrestling match for 'tag team champion of the world'
I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.
Judging by what's in the bathroom right now, I see you graced us with your presence last night.
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
It's not that drunk me is smarter; it's that sober me is secretly playing for the other team.
Be still, my beating vagina.
Trying to figure out what I just puked. Demon weed is salad. No more drunk buffets.
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
you ass-dialed me while you were fucking my ex.
that was on purpose.
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
Randomize
