its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
I'm about to take my first shit since thursday. I'm scared. pray for me. If I don't make it, tell my family I love them.
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
Just lit a joint with steel wool and a 9 volt battery... thank you 3rd grade science class
We have a drunk bartender with her nips a quarter inch from bein out buying us shots. GET HERE.
You just said the magic words
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
Do you think I can get away with quoting Work Bitch by Britney Spears in my speech?
I need to stop adding people I want to bone on LinkedIn.
..... starting now
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
Randomize
