There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
He set 8 alarms to make sure I took my birth control on time..
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
I've discovered that regular handcuff keys, sadly, do not work on real police handcuffs.
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
If I never see my landlord's dick again, it'll be too soon.
I have seriously seen way too may DIY cut off jean booty shorts and half shirts on fat girls this summer. Fuck you Pinterest.
May the power of my ass compel you!!
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
Randomize
