The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
Our kitchen sink faucet is leaking, so I set a pitcher under it to catch water for Kool-Aid tomorrow rather than turn on the faucet. The environment owes me.
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
The only way I can describe the noise he makes when he has an orgasm: dying walrus.
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
Our prom king just sent me a dick pic. I know it's 10 years later but I feel like I've finally made it.
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
Point in my hangover when I'm honestly not sure if I'm about to puke, or shit my pants.
Randomize
