Where were you when I was single???
Still in diapers.
Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
tell your sister to shave her snatch
i would really appreciate it if you would stop texting my girlfriend.
i would really appreciate it if you would stop cock blocking me.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
I might have been fine if i had magic teleportation powers and could have skipped the car ride between bar and home
Is there a non-awkward way to tell a girl I work with that she looks just like my favourite pornstar?
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
He has an accent when he types. I can *hear* the schnitzel. Especially when he's drunk.
You cannot ask her to resend the picture of her genital tattoo to you just so you can show your room mate. it is time to end your relationship with the Captain.
I'm always down for nudity.
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
Randomize
