I just remembered yelling "they're gonna let me be a lawyer! Me! Why would they do that?"
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
I wrote my name on his balls in sharpie. In the homosexual world that's like a diamond ring. Shits permanent.
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
Apparently throwing balloons filled with vodka off the roof is considered terrorism.
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
I'm at the point where I'm more upset that he got to keep my bottle of Fireball than that he stopped talking to me with no explanation
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower
I tried to fuck you in my bathroom while my parents were in the next room. I am a clusterfuck of fun.
Randomize
