When I was her age, Pluto was still a planet... but i said what the hell
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
She took the bride and groom figures and the top layer of their cake and tried to walk out of the reception with it in her purse.
Monday: I just need a drink Tuesday: OMG no more this week! Wednesday: oh shit how'd I get drunk Thursday: I'm glad you've stopped the pretenses
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
That's how you know it was a good night if two months later you finally realized your skirt never made it home and you found out where it was.
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
It's no shave November. This is our time.
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
Randomize
