Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
there should be a national holiday dedicated to how high i am
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
We got the possum out of our house. We built a maze with our empty kegs and chased it with brooms.
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
Never again will I go to my mom's side of the family's parties. After the bride and groom cut the head off the roasted pig together they boarded their RV and rode off into the sunset.
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
Randomize
