Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
THAT WAS PROBABLY MY ONE CHANCE TO SLEEP WITH A MAN NAMED BORIS AND YOU RUINED IT.
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
I might as well just sew it shut at this point.
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
my ex logged me out of his netflix so im gonna fuck his bestfriend as revenge
Mom got drunk as hell, crashed Dad's wedding and some how left with the best man. This is why you should be glad you aren't my sibling.
Randomize
