when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin
Just peed in the fountain while its snowing. Fell flat on my ass, literally my butt naked ass in a pile of snow. It's safe to say I'm done with drinking on weekdays
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
And now to play every stoner's favorite game: Where the Fuck Did We Park the Car?! Disneyland Edition!
I sang Seal's Kiss From a Rose to my quesadilla
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
This is a mass text. Who in the hell shat on my stairs last night?
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
Randomize
