Iced coffee. Banana. Two dumps. Life is good.
I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
Had to use Google translator to be able to tell the cleaning lady not to throw away the condoms we have strategically placed throughout the house.
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
The first crop top of the year and you're rocking it in the ER. #ratchet
What is my life?
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
He is more interested in finding his sweater than he is in having sex with me. It better be a great fucking sweater.
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
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