Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
i feel so shallow. people in iran are using twitter to write hardcore nathan hale shit about dying for freedom. my last tweet was "i hate the taco shits"
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
i had to get the starbucks manager to open the bathroom door for me...you passed out on the floor, the things i do for you
I already wrote the apology to my liver. He knows whats up
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
I just almost puked & then I panicked and forced it back down because I thought I would be a waste of the apple turnover I ate.. I'm that hungover
Omg I can't even...
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
If you think hives from an allergic reaction to lube is funny, remind me to tell you the story about how I got a black eye from masturbating.
you are the root of all my greats nights and my worsts decisions
Randomize
