it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
I elbow dropped a bag of ice to break it so we could make margaritas. I bled everywhere. Be proud.
Almost just got kicked out of a bar because the locals spilled beer everywhere when we taught them to shotgun.
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
perfect irony that i'm celebrating international women's day with a yeast infection
Do you know how hard it is to maintain a conversation with someone who just told you they put their cat in the fridge on purpose?
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
He's trying to marry me, when is the appropriate time to tell him my real name and that Dallas is a completely fictitious slutty alter ego? I need the advice of someone with morals.
While we were driving she just screams from the backseat: MUMFORD AND SONS DROP THE BANJO and made what were meant to be banjo sound effects
yeah but think of how much more hungover we'd be if we didn't steal those cookies
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
this relationship shit is hard. like i'd like to be able to watch veep without him trying to dry hump me. also im drunk and its 11 am so
The UTI came back with a vengeance.
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
Randomize
