well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
I dare you try and top an Eiffel tower full of Margarita
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
This Halloween will be different. I'm just here to get shitfaced, not troll around looking for slutty nun pussy.
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
I lowered my expectations when he started off saying "ah missionary, my specialty"
Is this like a preordered booty call?
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
My mom just came upstairs handed me an Adderall and asked if I could help her wash the ceilings
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
He’s definitely circumcised. There’s not enough room in those speedos for a foreskin with that fire hose he’s packing.
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