were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
Who knew that being in a committed relationship is the same thing as forced celibacy? Did not sign up for this.
I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
I'm only wearing socks and eating tuna, don't do this to me right now.
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
Randomize
