Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
8th day he invented the big mac, 9th he invented pop rocks, 10th day boobs.
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
The baby slept soo good last night. Its like he knows the importance of me being intoxicated all weekend.
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
He called my vagina "the man cave", and I found it charming
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
I found my parents stash of sex toys. You know my green one? My mom has it...in purple. I HAVE THE SAME VIBRATOR AS MY MOTHER
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
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