Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
i'm in hospital, i have an exam in 3 hours and the man in the cubicle next to me is doing a noisy poo. this has to get better.
summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
He came up behind me making dolphin noises in my ear when I noticed a collection of hors d'ouevres from the reception earlier in his jacket pocket
I will never doubt you again...he IS perfect for you
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
So I definitely tried to pay a cab with baseball tickets last night
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
I am a taco. I am also really high.
I've always seen you more as a chimichanga.
My husband is waiting until son is napping and air humps as a seduction tactic. Pray for me.
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
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