Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
we're microwaving frozen margaritas its not the same without u
Well the party says they're going to have three kegs and four trampolines. I think I'm going to invite my EMT buddies just to be safe.
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
Lmfao a voicemail screaming about you partying with your tits out and a text at 3 am saying you went too crazy... this should be a good one
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
Your shirt... Was in my pants
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
Randomize
