Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
No stitches, just platelets and will power
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
In other news, people don't judge you when you buy a vibrator if you buy a funny birthday card and bag with it. I learned that this weekend.
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
I responded with revoking his blow job privileges. Needless to say, he's learned his lesson.
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
Randomize
