hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
he was so drunk I had to hold him up and he started crying when he heard an ambulance siren and said "is that for me?"
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
I just shotgunned a beer alone in the bathroom...what do you expect from me
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
It's twenty thirteen and the rando and I bonded over the fact that we're both stil using flip phones. Of course I fucked him in the bathroom. It was the obvious thing to do.
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
I think my dove chocolate wrapper just told me to masturbate.
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
It's very disconcerting to wake up and she is gone. I never know where she could be. It's like playing wheres Waldo but Waldo could potentially be drunk and wandering around in weird places that normal Waldo's don't go.
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
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