I just realized that this morning is the first morning i've put on underwear in a week.
I love summer.
I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
at 4 in the morning i heated a family sized mac n cheese for a minute and decided to eat it frozen cuz I didn't wanna wait for that long
I will give everyone a free pointer today. Here it goes, always pee by the house late at night to avoid getting shot by drunk bastards with guns. Never go by the tree line.
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
broke the door off of my fridge tryin to have a indoor rodeo
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
There's times when I just want to bottle my farts for later they're so insane.
If anything I look like a soccor mom going out for her annual ladies night. Trying hard, but not quite in her twenty's anymore.
I feel like him using the excuse "I'm not a fan of lying" to stop me from sleeping around is hypocritical since he's cheating on his wife with me.
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Randomize
