So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
dude, despite what happened last night, I'm not gay
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
Let me put it this way - if I had a list of things I would like between my legs, she would rank below the cello I turned into firewood sophomore year.
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
The best part is every argument that she makes from here on out will be refuted by "Oh hey remember that time you shit yourself wearing someone else's sweatpants at a frat party?"
Hooker in the library. I repeat, we have a hooker in the library. This is not a drill.
Wait, tell the rest at happy hour. I wanna be able to interrupt you with my loud cackles and stupid questions.
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
Remember those neighbors I thought were FBI agents? Turns out they're DEA.
You peed on a flamingo?!?
Randomize
