So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
If she were to ever cheat on her husband, I'm positive I'm the the go to guy. Which flatters me and weirds me out at the same time.
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
If you get me so fucked up I can't use the microwave , I'm going to be so mad at you
Food lion is just a portal. Cheetos are the goal. Its like not banging a super hot chick cause she is french. She still has the same parts just from a different box.
Now I am going to fly my toy helicopter in the dark.
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
In my defense, I haven't stolen anyone's clothes yet.
Yeah, that's a plus.
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
He gave me the choice between a threeway with his best friend or a tiny turtle. Unfortunately I chose the threeway.
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
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