This is not my ceiling
just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
so i am drinking whiskey and watching home alone 2 by myself. it turns out moving to a foreign country isn't all that different after all.
Haha I wonder if my burp offended him. So I gave him a fist pump to signify how friendly I am
I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it.
we used the fire extinguisher you had been cuddling with to decorate the cop car while they were inside arresting everyone
I vaguely remember Matt shouting something about "GET ON MY LEVEL!" at the bartender before he attempted to order a case of tequila from him.
Dude, the coffee is horrible this morning, Cass changed something about it
We ran out of Bailey's Irish cream...
This is what regular coffee tastes like?!?! Fuck the adult life.
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
Do we have to do this party tonight? I'm worried my bed will miss me...
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
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