We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
I'm helping my Mormon ex boyfriend from high school embrace his inner cross dresser. This is truly god's work.
So on a scale of 1 to Friendship-Over, how mad would you be if a rando I brought home sharted on the shag carpet in the living room?
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
Pretty sure I used toilet water to wash vomit off my face last night...
walked into my roommates bathroom to her throwing up a quesadilla while singing come on skinny taco
My whole house smells like Spaghetti-Os and cat litter. I think I've failed as an adult.
There was a clear and well defined point last night where I could've decided to go home but no now I've woken up with glitter all over my nuts and potentially an std or 2
There are far too many naked dudes in your apartment, and they aren't even watching porn. I mean seriously, they've got the Lion King on.
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
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