So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
btw, i had a dream i drank 260-proof vodka last night. thank god that doesn't exist in real life.
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
I'm going to try to be reasonable tonight and keep my drink count out of double digits
Almost there.
define "almost". like I have enough time to watch a youtube video or oh shit, put on some goddamn pants because they're in the driveway.
im going to hold it over his head for all of eternity. when his children are born i am going to go to the hospital as his wife is giving birth and shove the picture in the childs face, so the first time they see their father is in a drunken stupor looking like a jackass.
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
I am available for nakedness
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
Randomize
