If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
I'm either too drunk or not bisexual anymore
just walked past a group of stoners who were staring open jawed in the spice aisle. tonight they will stumble upon something amazing.
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
He did the "not my house dance." Apparently it involves spreading cereal on the floor and then grinding into the carpet in bare feet while singing "not my house" over and over and dancing.
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
You had sex with a mute, how is that not funny
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
I'm sorry for getting drunk and throwing a robo-bird at you.
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
Randomize