Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
I just remembered yelling "they're gonna let me be a lawyer! Me! Why would they do that?"
How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
He just pushed one of his testicles up into his stomach and called himself lance armstrong. I can't make this shit up.
Every time you come over you bleed on everything. I'm not calling Verizon again asking if blood is considered water damage.
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
woke up and you werent here...its ok if we're never going to speak again but my furry hand cuffs are missing and i would like them back. thanks.
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
Got my client divorced finally. He was even awarded the cat ashes. Yep I went to law school for this.
burned my penis with a sauteed onion again.
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
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