people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
Dude made his own urinal by punching a hole in the wall and pissing in it rather than waiting in line. That is the stuff of legends.
I just need a text that says "put that food down bitch" and then maybe I'll lose water weight through tears
FOund a bunch of old fireworks spring cleaning.
Who is our new insurance provider?
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
You can now call me Rabbi, and I can now perform weddings, funerals, and other services in all fifty states. You're welcome, world.
Randomize