I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
WHO INVENTED HANGOVERS WHERE ARE MY CLOTHES
He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy.
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
I forgot to tell you, wear something you can puke on Saturday. We're christening this marriage with a shot of jager. NOT KIDDING.
I GOT MY PERIOD THIS IS A GLORIOUS DAY I AM TOTALLY GOING TO MAKE PIES TO CELEBRATE THAT THERE ARE NO REPUBLICANS IN MY UTERUS!
I thought he was being really sweet and protective when he pulled me away from the guy i was hooking up with, but turns out he just wanted me to get chicken nuggets with him...
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
I wouldn't even cut tickets or put ppl in jail I'd just hand out punches to the mouth and Liam Neeson throat chops
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
He turned on read receipts specifically so i'd know he was ignoring me.
Randomize
