is it bad that i shorted Freddie Mac immediatly after I heard about the CFO?
If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
i know you like preteen girls so i'm gonna offer you some advice...dump a bucket of glitter on yourself and walk into the sunlight. they will come running.
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
Would it be in bad taste to ask Marky Mark to sign the vibrator I named after him?
So squirting runs in the family.
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
There was a tour on campus today, and there were two girls i went to high school with in the group. They saw me and ran up to me as i was unlocking my door. when i opened it, kate was laying in a pile of glitter and beer cans. We need to reevaluate.
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
It's 3 am. Nothing I've tried can get the taste of failure and vomit out of my mouth.
Randomize
