Girls should come with a carfax report
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
So I met my girlfriends dad last night. Or should I say I re-met that mall cop that had to tackle me.
how are things with the new girl?
good, we have nothing in common but she likes being choked
do you remember when we thought we were both knocked up by the same guy like two days apart and would have half twins? Thats a best friend moment.
So last night I kicked a beer can off of a frat guys head and it nailed one of my sisters in the face. Think i'll be brought up on standards?
What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?
Mobile recharge?
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
I'm at a gyno in Japan. Safe to say every possible rule of etiquette is about to be broken. Buckle up, motherfuckers.
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
Come to this bar
But I'm full of food.
MAKE ME FULL OF YOUR DICK
did you call me last night and say you were being kidnapped?
Randomize
