so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung
Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
i pretty much saved your life. you were so conviced that your nail polish remover bottle was "Vodka Lemon"
My mom make sausages for dinner...and all I could think of was your dog's penis..
Dude, a dry wedding reception should nullify the vows, because really, without the booze, you might as well be 5 years old again and playing dress-up
So you know that marine I slept with, well his girlfriend just told me I was pretty, I almost feel bad for sleeping with him now...
Dont! You were just serving you country
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what?
The maintenance guy says happy birthday. Also, he likes your penis balloon.
I just found out that I slept with Kate Gosselin's publicist back in June . Brb I have to wash myself endlessly.
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
Randomize
