I'm lost and stupid without you.
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
Replacing day drinking with a real job was the worst decision I've ever made.
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
He's sending me pics of Yellowstone scenery...the only thing I can think is "I would have sex next to that waterfall"
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
Showed up to the airport to find my fuck buddy is on the same flight. Do you think he'd be intertested in the mile high club?
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
If Dr Phil has taught me anything about myself, it’s that I can seriously relate to those women who fake their pregnancies.
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
I told you that you couldn’t eat fifty tacos, you slapped me in the face, ate seventeen tacos, and fell asleep on my floor
Randomize
