I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
just fyi, hangover + ice skates = really bad idea
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
Welp. I just hopped out of his window to avoid meeting his parents... happy monday!
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
If you've ever wondered what a shitshow is, just watch me at the bar on a Friday. Or Tuesday. Take your pick.
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
Well get back to your date and give him the ceremonial 1am handy and text me when your done.
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
Randomize
