im about as happy as oj after his trial
hahaha! you have a girlfriend
tell that to the new girl at work who i screwed on the washing machine today...
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
you told grandpa to call you daddy
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
Tell me why I woke up spooning a hamburger like it was a teddy bear.
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
"Like what guy would respond to 'let's fuck. I've got bagels'??"
There's no button for "gave my boyfriend's cock to a friend" on my intimacy calendar.
I hate political talk. I just wanna get fucked into an alternate universe where Bernie Sanders is president.
For future reference: bathtub full of cheeseburgers = win.
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
Randomize
