you fell asleep during kickboxing this morning
how does that even happen??
just caught my little brother jacking off the family pet
I think I just met the technical qualifications for binge drinking in five minutes
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
As I sit on the toilet at 4 am I realize tonight could have gone a lot better
Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
Randomize
