...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
I was just wished a Happy Valentine's Day by the (Mexican) Chinese food delivery guy. I've never had clearer "get your life together" message than that.
Had to. She was getting married in 2 days & her vag was having a close out sale. You know I love a good bargain.
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
You said you didn't want to drink anymore so you started shooting vodka down the back of your throat using a syringe. Oh, and then you aimed it at my eye ball...vodka in the eye hurts btw.
You are number one in my heart. But in the dick Olympics you're disqualified.
Things I just found under my covers: protein bar, string cheese, vibrator.
We're gonna have screwdrivers in a cab at 4am?
Is that weird?
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
I just saw my 7th grade teacher at the club. We had a pretty good talk over drinks. Turns out we both like dancing on tables.
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
Randomize
