My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
you made me "pop lock and drop it" as a sobriety test last night..
She told me to wait on the sofa while she freshened up. She's been in the bathroom for an hour. I have a bad feeling about this.
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
The cop was more concerned with the syringes on the dash board than looking for the source of the smoke. Thank god for diabetes!
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
I need to make a new year's resolution to only pee in toilets. And it needs to start happening before the new year.
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
Are you still free tonight?
Oh shit I kinda forgot and took acid
I'm about to turn myself in when I'm less hungover.
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
Randomize
